Many leaders believe being hard on themselves makes them more effective.
The research says otherwise. A study by Neff et al. (2021) found self-compassion actively reduces burnout and boosts motivation.
One senior manager we worked with constantly replayed mistakes in their head, believing self-criticism kept them sharp. In coaching, they realised this mindset drained their energy - and that their team actually mirrored that pressure. By practising self-compassion, they not only reduced their stress but noticed their team became more open, collaborative, and innovative.
What tone are you modelling for your team - criticism or compassion?
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